By neighbors’ dad insists on mowing their lawn at least twice a week, especially when I’m trying to enjoy my hammock.

How can I sabotage their mowers so it looks like normal wear and tear so that he doesn’t mow the lawn more than once a week.

inb4: suburbs suck

ETA: How does it take you three hours to mow a quarter acre on a riding mower?

  • FauxLiving@lemmy.world
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    4 hours ago

    For around $1 million USD, you would launch it into orbit.

    This would not cause any additional wear and tear so it would look pretty normal (through a telescope).

  • LOLseas@lemmy.zip
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    8 hours ago

    Also, I think we all should acknowledge this is Dullsters. ITT it’s violence all up and down. Come on, team.

    • Emotional_Series7814@piefed.zip
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      4 minutes ago

      Yeah, somehow I think sabotaging another person('s property) qualifies as dramatic, not as dull. Wonder if all the upvotes are from drive-by folks who didn’t check the community name. Also breaks rule 4, this isn’t an advice forum.

  • RustyShackleford@piefed.social
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    13 hours ago

    Maybe try buying him a hammock? All the other ideas lead to either a lawsuit, someone’s death or simple violence. Because littering his lawn with bike chains would be dangerous for everyone.

  • tal@lemmy.today
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    14 hours ago

    neighbors’ dad insists on mowing their lawn at least twice a week, especially when I’m trying to enjoy my hammock.

    Noise-cancelling headphones.

    • Boomer Humor Doomergod@lemmy.worldOP
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      12 hours ago

      You’d think that.

      You’d really think that.

      But the noise just comes through slightly muffled. It’s still BZZZRBZZZRBZZRB but more like bzzrvbzzzrcbzzzrbzzrb

      And if it lasted a reasonable amount of time it would be one thing. But he’s out there. going over the same patch of lawn like five times

      And then.

      And then.

      He mows the entire lawn AGAIN using a push mower with a bag attachment

      Edit: AND HE DOESNT EVEN EMPTY THE BAG

  • CompactFlax@discuss.tchncs.de
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    14 hours ago

    riding mower

    That’s your problem, they’re designed for people who want to waste time on their lawn and drink a beer. People who want to get it done with have zero turn mowers.

    Sodium silicate in the oil. Bleach in the gas. An iron spike driven into the ground just below the height of the grass.

    But really the best way to deal with it is to get over it. I know sometimes it’s hard to get over an irritating sound, but it helps your mental health if you don’t get angry about something minor and entirely outside your control

    • Boomer Humor Doomergod@lemmy.worldOP
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      12 hours ago

      I can deal with someone like that.

      The problem is it’s his daughter’s lawn. And as the dad of lady-presenting people I empathize with him to an extent.

      He’s not mowing f his lawn. He’s taking care of his kid.

      So I’m looking for a way to let him know his kid is safe without it barely inconveniencing me.

      • Ananääs@sopuli.xyz
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        3 hours ago

        Well obviously you need to set up a conspiracy cult agains the Big Lawnmower and get the lady to join!

      • MML@sh.itjust.works
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        3 hours ago

        Get out your push mower, take off that shirt… Have someone subtly play Hustlin’ by Rick Ross in the background and get to work

  • rtxn@lemmy.world
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    13 hours ago

    If it uses a combustion engine, you could try putting something hydrocarbon-soluble in the fuel, like polystyrene. Some of it will get past the fuel filter and foul up the carburetor (and probably the spark plug) without causing permanent damage to the engine. Removing the blockage is trivial, all you need to do is soak and rinse the parts in fresh gasoline, but the diagnosis and disassembly requires some effort and technical knowledge.

  • Natanael@slrpnk.net
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    14 hours ago

    Do not cause permanent damage. Absolutely don’t. Not worth it.

    Try to sell him on something quieter. If he absolutely wants a mower he can ride on, try to sell him on a better and quieter electric one.

    If he absolutely won’t change, see if a noise complaint is possible (get a logging decibel meter).

    And last, just unplug stuff. It can be plugged back in and it’s not destructive, but IS very annoying

        • Boomer Humor Doomergod@lemmy.worldOP
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          12 hours ago

          He’s using some late-70s Craftsman. There’s no money for it.

          What if I buy them an electric mower and sneak it in there?

          Better: Electrify the old Craftsman.

          • LOLseas@lemmy.zip
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            8 hours ago

            Have you considered those plain foam earplugs? Now you can get 'em at super isolating ratings. If you’re in The States, give Alpine earplugs a check. Comes with a variety of noise-block interchangeable/swappable inner filters, and not for much scratch.

            Noise can definitely be a nuisance, but think about what you can do for your first lines of defense. Don’t go on the offense.

      • bufalo1973@piefed.social
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        12 hours ago

        “Sprinkle” the lawn with some stones. Big enough to fuck the blade but little enough so he won’t see them. And not many.